Naruto's Surprise
by OinLovesAnime
Summary: It's about a little anonymous 'surprise' for Naruto. Is this the Akatsuki's plan to kill Naruto? Or a secret admirer? Maybe the gift has it's own ideas. Your guess is as good as mine. Read more to find out.    I don't own the Shinobi world. I just own a p
1. Chapter 1

**Naruto's Present**

**Chapter 1:**

A lonely falcon desperately flapped. By the time it reached the bird houses of the Konoha postal service it was already beyond its limit. It collapsed on the arms of a confused Postal Service shinobi. The shinobi looked at the panting bird & then the large package it deposited in his arms.

"What the…" he exclaimed.

The package was addressed to 'My Dear Naruto', without a signature, or a return address & most disconcertingly, it _moved_. Without further ado, the shinobi quickly took it to the Hokage sama.

/ Hokage's Office /

Shizune banged the door in, "Tsunade sama! There is a mysterious incident that needs your attention!"

The Hokage spilled her tea all over her desk as she quickly attempted to hide a certain small orange book from view.

"A-h… Shi-Shizune! What is the matter?" stammered Tsunade.

"Tsunade sama…" Shizune said with a twitch, "What is that you are reading? It looks suspiciously like one of those _Icha Icha_ porn thingies.

Tsunade shoved Jiraiya's _Icha Icha Paradise_ under the desk, "Shizune! Do not get distracted by unnecessary things. What is the important thing you want to tell me?"

Shizune became serious once more, "Tsunade sama, it's about this mysterious package that the Postal Service received today. Apparently the transporting hawk was half-dead from carrying the heavy package. It contains no seal or signature, no trace of its origin & most peculiarly…"

Tsunade concentrated…

"The package wriggles!" Shizune finished lamely.

"Eh?" Tsunade sweat dropped. "Bring the thing here", She commanded.

Upon closer inspection of the package she said, "It's addressed to Naruto. Where on earth could it have come from? It seems that something alive is inside. Or it could be some sort of jutsu…"

"Tsunade sama", Shizune interjected, "Since it's Naruto it could be some sort of trap. Maybe it's from the Akatsuki!"

"Hmm… Lock it up, Shizune & don't tell Naruto anything about this."

So Shizune went to lock the package up in a storage cellar. Little did she know that after a while the package got up, wriggled itself out of the window & went off to find a certain blonde Konoha Shinobi.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

Apparently 'blonde' was the key. Or so the package thought as it wandered around. Soon it found its target. A figure, it hoped it was a figure, had 2 arms, 2 legs & a roundish yellow blob at the top. That pretty much qualified as human. The package jumped up & attacked the yellow bit. Ino screamed as something dark & slimy swallowed her head & then the rest of her followed.

To casual observers it would appear that the blonde Kunoichi had disappeared & in her place was a wobbling card-board box. The box chewed & chewed. Something was feeling (assuming it could feel at all) unusual. Was this really the destination of the package? It decided it was not & spat out a slimy, saliva-coated, unconscious Ino. Then it wobbled on.

A while later, Shikamaru happened to come by the same path and spotted the slimy, buckled up body of Ino.

"Passing out in the middle of the street. What a pain," he sighed. Then he picked up Ino's body, wincing as the stinky slime got stuck all over him, carried her away. At the back of his mind, the sticky goo started to bother him. It didn't make sense.

The box hobbled onwards. Clearly, 'blonde' was _not _the key. So what else was there? The next description was 'spiky haired'. It wandered through the streets of Konoha & found a _major_ problem. Almost every shinobi was spiky haired. If the box had a head, it would have scratched it. But of course it didn't. No need to be silly about it. So like a logical minded scientist it decided on trial & error.

**Trial 1:**

Kiba & Akamaru were both swallowed whole while returning from the vet. After a second's consideration, the box spat Akamaru out. Of all the things it was, it wasn't stupid. It knew a dog when it saw one. They tended to pee all over the place.

Akamaru woofed aggressively (it's still in puppy stage) at the box & tried to bite it. The box woofed back louder. A frenzied canine-cardboard fight ensued. Neither side refused to budge. Suddenly they were enveloped by a horde of card-board eating moths. Shino ran to Akamaru's rescue. The box jumped back with fury.

Shino was surprised to find Akamaru attacking the box, even more surprised to find his more intelligent insects attacking it. Then the package got really annoyed & swallowed the moths too. Shino gawked & his hood fell open.

The box stopped & pondered Shino's hair-style. Then it shrugged & ate him too. Akamaru woofed even more angrily while the package digested its latest meal. Then deciding they were the wrong Naruto, it spat them out too. Trial 1 ended with 2 errors. The box moved on.

After a while, Shikamaru came there dragging Ino, panting from the exertion. He saw Kiba & Shino passed out on the streets, Akamaru industriously licking them clean.

"Two more!" groaned Shikamaru, "What a royal pain!"

He promptly decided that the day he would carry three people around the village would be the day he grew a tail & turned into a jinchuuriki. So he kicked Kiba's face.

"Hnnh", Kiba mumbled.

"Get up idiot," Shikamaru said while kicking Shino awake too, "What happened? Why are you both covered with slime?"

"Why? Because I got swallowed by a box", Shino panted, "Why? Because I was trying to save Kiba. Why? Because _he_ got swallowed by a box. Why…"

"Whoa there, wait," Interrupted Shikamaru, "You got swallowed by a _box_?"

"I know it sounds silly. Why? Because people just don't get swallowed by card board boxes," replied Shino.

"Hnnnmh… Who got swallowed by what?" mumbled Kiba still dazed.

Shikamaru sighed & glanced at the still unconscious Ino, "You better start from the beginning."

**Trial 2:**

The box hobbled on & discovered to its great glee the spikiest hair it had seen so far. It was grey in colour. That was pretty close to blonde wasn't it? The face of the shinobi was covered by a mask upto his nose but that wasn't important. It was the hair. It was perfect. So the crafty little package sneaked up behind the man reading the little orange book. It couldn't wait to get Trial 2 under way.


End file.
